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Chapter 08

Home Chapter 08

Copyright 2012 Banzai Ben and Amazing Anastasia


The night after "The dinner"

Present – Yasmeen and Zarika – At the cabin


The very mean Jennifer lady is forcing us to clean the kitchen with a toothbrush. I look at Zarika but she glares at me when I question, "Zarika, I think the two of us could attack the mean Jennifer lady."


Zarika doesn't respond, I hear a zing and feel one of the rubber bands as it hits me and raises another red spot on my beautiful skin. The very mean Jennifer lady orders, "I said no talking and that's what I mean."


I begin to cry and the very mean Jennifer lady yells, "Mess with me and you'll pay the price."


I am very angry at Yasmeen! She has gotten the Jennifer lady very upset at us. This is all her fault and I will find some way to make her pay.


Present – Liz – At the cabin


I wander back into the kitchen after finally getting all the food out of my hair and Jens (who is still a huge mess) still has the two brats working. I walk over and say, "So when are you going to clean up?"


She replies, "After these two learn the lesson about having a food fight in my kitchen."


Yeah, Yasmeen yelled something at Ira then threw her whole plate of food which surprised the hell out of all of us and totally covered Ira. Alexi retaliated by smashing his plate in Yasmeen's face and accidentally got some on Zarika so Zarika also retaliated. I was shocked that Mira and Ira even got in on the 'fun.' I thought those two were more mature, but I guess Ira was damn insulted by Yasmeen.


I asked, "But toothbrushes on the floor, isn't that going a little too far?"


She smiles and answers, "Not really. I want those two to understand who's the alpha bitch in this house. Besides they're almost done. You might want to get to sleep since O-four-hundred comes early tomorrow."


I glare at Jens and complain, "Don't tell me we're all falling out for PT?"


She grins and replies, "Okay, I won't tell you."


I rethink my previous joy at having Jens back - crap, I might have liked the old slightly crazy Jens a little bit better.  But I reply, "Okay I'm hitting the sack."


Present – Ira and Mira – At the cabin


I traverse the floor and complain, "I can not believe what that annoying little female saluki called me and did to me."


Mira states, "Calm yourself my sister, once again the two of us fighting as a team prevailed."


I pause, grin and correct, "You mean the three of us! Did you observe Alexi? He will be quite a formidable young warrior with proper guidance."


Mira fully-glee giggles, "Yes my sister Ira! I stand corrected and I share your feelings. That reminds me, Ms. Donaldson says we are all 'falling out for PT at O-four-hundred' tomorrow. This will be an excellent start to his training, but we should acquire our rest."


She smiles at me, comes to bed and for the first time in a very long time I sleep like the angels while embraced by my sister Ira...


Present – Thom and Byron – At the cabin


Thom complains, "Just look at the mess your girls made of my clothes."


I counter, "My girls, they sure as hell aren't my girls."


Too late I realize I was baited when Thom laughs, "Excuse me, I meant you and your wife Mira's girls."


I flip him off, roll over and say, "I can't wait to see how bad your ass is going to be dragging tomorrow during Jennifer's PT."


Thom swears, "Damn, I have to figure out some way around that BS. I did all the PT I needed to do in the Army.


Now it's my turn so I counter, "Well you have put on some weight and could stand the exercise."


He complains, "Shut up and go to sleep."


Present – Linus and Maria – At the cabin


I didn't mind the food fight since it gave us both a chance to 'clean up' together in the shower. We were finally both clean and tired when we hit the sack. Maria's cuddling with me and I remind her, "You said you had something to tell me earlier?"


She smiles, tells me and I…I…I can't believe it…


Present – Jack and Masha – At the cabin


It took forever to clean up, but I can't complain too much. Masha got Vanya cleaned up first, then came into the shower and… Well I sure as hell don't kiss and tell!


We're holding each other in bed and Masha says, "Jack I have one more very important piece of information."


I reply, "Masha, I don't care what you did in your past."


Then she drops the bombshell, "Well, do you care about us having another baby?"


I’m suddenly sitting up in bed, turn on the light look at her and ask, "Are you serious?"


She smiles and states, "Yes Jack, you are going to be a father again."


I hug her and yell, "Wow I'm going to be a father again! I hope it's a girl this time and that she looks just like you."


She moves back against me and states, "Yes Jack, God has blessed us again."


Present – Matt, Jim and Bernie – At the cabin


I complain, "That was a terrible night."


Jim agrees, "Hell yes it was! Did you see all that good food that was wasted?"


I laugh, "But the look on Jens' face was priceless."


Jim laughs, "Yeah it was but what about her 'punishment'."


It's my turn to laugh and I answer, "Yeah but somehow I don't think those two girls have learned their lesson yet."


Jim questions, "So when's your wife coming?"


I answer, "Tomorrow."


He laughs, "Well it will be good to be in the room with just Bernie. Maybe he doesn't snore as much as you."


I laugh, "Yeah look who's talking."


Bernie complains, "You both need to get some sleep."


The next morning

Present – Yasmeen and Zarika – At the cabin

It seems like my head just touched the pillow when the door to our room flies open. The lights are flipped on, there is this loud horn that scares me and I fall out the bed!


The very mean Jennifer lady yells, "You two have twenty minutes to get into these clothes and be outside."


I look over and see Zarika is out of her bed in her fighting stance. She looks at me and says, "Yasmeen, you need to get ready."


I roll back over and state, "I will not because I have not had sufficient beauty sleep."



Yasmeen is going to make another mistake with the Jennifer lady and this time I am going to make sure to distance myself from her. I understand that getting the Jennifer lady upset is not wise. I begin to dress in these funny clothes and go outside. When I arrive outside it is still dark and the air is very cold but I do see the Liz lady, I walk towards her and she questions, "How was your wakeup call?"


I reply, "I understand not wakeup call."


The Liz lady answers, "The way Jens woke you up."


I complain, "Nice it was not." And shiver…


Present – Liz – At the cabin


Yeah I knew better after being with Jens and Ben at her parent's house to let Jens wake me up. So I set two alarm clocks and put one on the dresser where I would have to get out of bed. And the sneak came into my room with a damn air horn. When she saw I was up I laughed, "Yeah there's no way in hell I was letting you wake me up."


She grinned, honked the horn anyway and laughed, "Yeah Ben taught both of us the price for sleeping in."


I question, "Are you doing this to Byron and Thom because it might give them a heart attack?"


She grins, "Hell yes - there are no favorites around here!"


She leaves and I shake my head, yeah the slightly crazy Jens had some benefits – like sleeping in. I get dressed and go outside to wait.


Present – Byron and Thom – At the cabin


I set my alarm fifteen minutes early, it goes off and Thom complains, "What the hell is that damn noise."


I state, "Thom we have fifteen minutes to be outside for PT."


Thom rolls over and yells, "I'm not getting out of this bed until hell freezes over. It's still dark outside."


I'm dressed when Jennifer comes into the room. she gives me a wicked smile then walks over, puts this damn air horn right at the back of Thom's head and let's go with a long blast then jumps back. Thom flies out of bed like his ass in on fire and yells, "What the hell did you do that for?" And I laugh my ass off!


Jennifer orders, "PT outside in ten minutes now move your ass. And by the way, next time you decide to sleep in, wear some pajamas because I don't need to see your wrinkly old body this early in the morning."


She leaves and Thom shouts after her, "You're a damn slave driver!"


Then he looks and me and yells, "What are you laughing at."


I calmly answer, "I think hell just froze over."


Present – Maria and Linus – At the cabin


I set the alarm early because Linus and I could use a different sort of workout, one that's not horizontal. But he's been a pain in the rear all morning. He questions again, "Maria do you really think…"


I interrupt, "Linus, we've been over this before and hell yes we're both working out."


My Princess Boss knocks on the door and asks, "Is it safe to come in?"


I answer, "Sure come on in."


She walks in and Linus complains, "Jens, I don't think Maria should do PT today, she's sick."


Jens looks at me and questions, "Maria, you look fine to me, don't tell me you of all people are going to be a malingerer?"


I get angry at Linus and answer, "Hell no Jens, Linus is just being a stupid male! He's worried because I'm a couple days late and that happens sometimes."


Jens raises this air horn, honks it and says, "Okay both of you need to get your asses outside right now."


She leaves the room, I stick my tongue out at Linus and complain, "The next time this happens, if there is a next time, don't go telling the whole world about it."


We head outside…


Present – Matt, Jim and Bernie – At the cabin


I wake up early and roust Jim, "Hey Jens will be here soon and we need to earn our keep."


Jim states, "Yeah I can't believe we're doing PT again. That was one part of the Corps I don't miss."


I laugh, "Yeah but the old Jens is back and you know she's got some evil way planned to wake us up."


We hear an air horn - at first we think it's a warning of some kind. Then Bernie rolls over and explains, "Shit! Liz told me about Ben using an air horn to wake her and Jens up."


Jim says, "That bastard, one more reason to kick his ass when we catch him."


We get dressed and head outside…


Present – Jack and Masha – At the cabin


I made sure we had the room furthest down the hall and set the alarm early. But I didn't need it, I woke up about thirty before it was supposed to go off and had been thinking about being a dad again. It was both exciting and a bit scary: After all most men are thinking about retiring at my age and here I am going to have another mouth to feed.


I slip out of bed, turn off the alarm so it doesn't bother Masha and Ivan and begin to get dressed. I hear the damn air horn down the hallway and I'm glad as hell I woke up early. Banzai pulled this damn air horn trick on me before and it damn near gave me a heart attack. I laugh and wonder when he pulled it on Jens and if she kicked his ass for doing it. It did wake up Masha. She rolls over and asks, "Jack was that a warning klaxon?"


I walk over and calm her, "No Masha it's Jens perverse manner of waking us up today. But don't worry, I will tell her about you and you can stay in bed all day."


She jumps out of bed and states, "Jack do not be a moronic male. I am capable of exercising with everyone else. However what will we do with Ivan."


I look him, then I hear Jens close to our door and say, wait a minute. I run to the door, yank it open and yell, "Booooo."


Jens drops the damn air horn and laughs, "I guess Ben must have taught this trick to you."


I state, "Hell yes he did. So did you kick his ass?"


She giggles, "No but I sure wanted to."


I question, "So what are we supposed to do with Ivan."


She answers, "Well I know Masha is a Russian mother so she will dress him warmly. Bring him with the two of you because he can play and then when we go for the run, we have a jogging stroller and a baby pack. The guys can take turns pushing him or carrying him."


Masha questions, "Will my baby boy be safe."


Jens replies, "You bet he will, I will make sure of it. Now you two have five minutes."


That lights a fire under Masha so somehow she gets dressed (and looks as beautiful as ever), gets Ivan dressed and we head outside…


Present – Jens – At the cabin


I get outside, Sharik runs up and greets me. I see Jack and question, "Are all here and accounted for?"


He laughs, "No Sir! We're missing Yasmeen."


I complain, "Don't call me Sir I work for a living! Okay Matt lead everyone in some calisthenics while I get the malingerer."


Sharik begins to bark and I say, "No I don't think I need you for this job. But you will be needed later today." And I giggle as he goes back over and begins playing with Ivan - it looks like it's some version of tag. Sharik runs up and touches Ivan with his nose then Ivan giggles and chases Sharik.


Yeah I should have fucking known that Yasmeen would be a problem, but that's okay because if she wants a fight, she's going to get the fight of her life.


I grab the surprise I had planned just for this occasion from the porch because I knew I would need it for someone. Then I storm into her room.


Present – Yasmeen and Zarika – At the cabin


I am finally having my marriage ceremony with Ben when all of a sudden freezing water is thrown on me. I jump out of bed, realize it was a dream and the very mean Jennifer lady is holding a bucket and yells, "Didn't I tell you to get outside?"


I am angry and yell, "Up yours crack ho!"


She pulls out the gun that shoots rubber bands, begins to shoot me and yells, "The next time you use those words I will wash your mouth out with soap. Now get dressed."


I reluctantly get dressed in the ugly clothes she gave me, put on shoes, then she grabs my arm and pulls me outside. It's freezing so I complain, "Hair is wet and I am cold."


She states, "That's your reward for being late."


I look and see my ex-friend Zarika is doing exercises with the others and realize I am all alone until my Ben comes back to save me. This is just the beginning of the worst day of my life…


I am wise to put distance between myself and Yasmeen because when the Jennifer lady brings her outside she looks like a drowned rat and I must fight back laughter. I can tell she is angry and I am sure she will blame me for her problems. But this time it is totally her fault.


The Jennifer lady takes over the exercises and I study her carefully. So this is the woman my Ben fell in love with. She is not the like fat American woman I assumed she would be, she is perhaps in better shape than me. I secretly smile inside because I know if I follow her training that with my young age I will easily surpass her level of fitness. Yes, she does not realize it but she is training her replacement with Ben…