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Chapter 16

Home Chapter 16

Copyright 2012 Banzai Ben and Amazing Anastasia


Flashback – Ira – Undisclosed location


Female-Saluki! I had just acquired the target and my sister Mira terminated it before I could squeeze the trigger. Mira has inflicted this torture upon me for the past thirty minutes.


Flashback – Major M – Undisclosed location


The L.Cpl. complained (he was only here because he was the one that spilled the beans to the Old Man), "What in the hell are they doing?"


I looked at the Sgt. and he shook his head and instructed the L. Cpl., "It's called target practice. They are doing it to make sure they have the windage down. Now shut the hell up and give us a hand."


He again complained, "I don't think this plan is going to work."


I'd had my fill of his whining so I ordered, "Sgt., the next time he complains shoot him."


The Sgt. grinned in response, "Gladly."


The L.Cpl. began to open his mouth, thought better of it and continued to help us move the ammo boxes.


Flashback – Mira – Undisclosed location


This was an amusing pastime I never grow old of. We had the Malodorous Major M and his men trapped in the disabled vehicle and now we were shooting random pieces off the vehicle. I knew exactly which one my sister Ira would attempt next, so I would acquire it prior to her readiness and terminate it. Yes my sister Ira was the swordswoman - but I was the riflewoman.


Pause, something unexpected happened…


Flashback – Major M – Undisclosed location


I looked at my two men and announced, "Okay time to see what happens."


At first I had considered trying to cut a hole in the bottom of the Humvee and sneaking out that way, but the floor was too damn thick. However from all the Sedankina bitches firing, they showed me that they might have made a slight error in their choice of sniper locations - they were located at about a one-hundred degree angle off the front of the Humvee, which left the back of the Humvee unguarded.


I opened the back door, then the tailgate and waited, sure enough…


Flashback – Mira and Ira – Undisclosed location


I could see the back of the vehicle open so I began firing at it and my sister Ira joined me. They would not accomplish their escape that easily from us.


Then something emerged from the back of the vehicle, but I could not acquire the target…


Yes, they attempted to escape, however Mira and I fired multifarious times which stopped their immediate escape. They then discharged some waste articles from the vehicle which I chose to ignore.


The vehicle settled back down and now it was time to continue our innocent pastime… Perhaps if I thought like an illogical harlequin…


Flashback – Major M – Undisclosed location


I smiled at the Sgt. "Well, it looks like that worked."


He said, "Yeah no one fired at the ammo can."


I agreed, "You are right. L.Cpl. how's it coming with those seats?"


He answered, "Sir, I will have them done in about another thirty minutes."


Yeah, it looked like my plan for getting us out of the Humvee would work. However, I had no idea how we would escape the Sedankina bitches after that…


Flashback – Jack – Undisclosed location


After a hasty but great as hell repair we were on the road again. I asked, "Okay Banzai what's the plan."


He stated, "Jack I don't have a plan because I have no idea what we're going to face."


I reminded him, "You do know trucks are not supposed to do what you have the Frankmonster doing."


He laughed, "Oh really, I guess you've never heard of the Dakar race. They have trucks in there that would shame my girl."


I laughed, "Only until you fired off one of the rockets, then nothing's going to catch you."


He grinned then pointed, "Jack is that what I think it is?"


I said, "Hell yes, it's the Humvee. Quick get us out of here until we can figure out a plan."


Flashback – Ben – Undisclosed location


I spun the wheel and floored my Frankentruck until I couldn't see the Humvee in my rear view, then I pulled over, stopped and asked, "Where the hell is the map?"


Jack pulled out the map, we calculated our location, then I saw it and pointed, "Jack that big assed dune will be perfect."


He agreed, "Yeah we can crawl to the top and see what the hell is going on."


I took a circuitous route, climbed the back side of the dune, stopped a hundred meters from the top, shut off the engine and tossed the camo net over the girl. I heard rifle fire and stated, "Jack that has to be one of the girls PSG-1's."


Jack stated the obvious, "Well let's go see what the hell they are shooting at."


Flashback – Mira and Ira – Undisclosed location


Fecal Matter! My sister Ira has changed the game and I could no longer predict her targets. It was as if she was as fickle as the harlequins! So I decided to write a message into the windshield!


Yes my plan worked - Mira could no longer determine my next target. Now if I could only do this when we needed a different approach at the capture the harlequins. However Mira fired at something so I observed through the scope with my ocular units and laughed…


Flashback – Major M – Undisclosed location


The L.Cpl. whined, "Sir they're shooting through the windshield."


The Sgt. stated in reply, "Well keep your head down and you might not get shot. Plus the sooner you finish with those seats the sooner we can leave."


I looked up and was shocked when I saw it…


Flashback – Jack – Undisclosed location


Son of a bitch! Banzai's luck held and we were in the perfect location. Below us on a dune was one of the girls and they were firing at the Humvee. I couldn't see the other girl but that didn't matter. Then I noticed something and said, "Banzai, look at the windshield."


He looked then laughed, "Damn Jack I never thought anyone would fire a heart into the windshield of a disabled Humvee."


We slid back down the dune some, I looked at Banzai and could tell he was thinking so I left him alone with his thoughts.


Finally he turned towards me, grinned and announced, "Jack, I've got the perfect plan."


He told me his 'perfect plan' and I complained, "Banzai, I hate to tell you this, but if it goes wrong you're dead."


He gave me a strange look and explained, "Then today would be a good day to die. Now you get the rifles and get setup while I build what I need."


I didn't like this idea, but if we did pull it off it would be one of our greatest ever…


Flashback – Ben – Undisclosed location


I ran back to my Frankentruck and tossed the gear in the back - now just where the hell was it? Ah there was that disposable film camera. I busted the hell out of the case, pulled out the guts, removed the battery (so I didn't get shocked), pulled off the flash, combined it with a few other things, duct taped it all together and I was done. Now I needed someone to test it on. I looked at Jack and knew better than to test it on him, then a big black scorpion showed up, I touched him with it, pushed the button and he curled up dead. I thought for a moment that it might be too strong, then I decided it would probably be fine on a human since they were so much larger.


I jumped into my ghillie suit and ran back over to the top of the dune. Jack had set up another camo net as his ghillie suit. He looked at my contraption and asked, "What's that - the illegitimate son of a cattle prod? Are you sure it works?"


I laughed, "No it's a cross between a cattle prod and a stun gun. I tried it on a scorpion and it killed him, I could try it on you if you would like."


He argued, "Get that damn thing away from me. What in the hell did you use?"


I grinned and replied, "I used a disposable film camera that I modified and then connected it to the old motorcycle battery. I ran both the leads up to the end of this tube so all I have to do is touch them to someone, push this button and they get zapped."


Jack questioned, "Aren't you worried a motorcycle battery will make it too powerful?"


I stated, "No the battery is half-shot so I think we're fine."


He asked, "Just where do you plan on poking her with it?"


I grinned, "Well, she probably has body armor in most places except for her ass."


He chuckled, "Brand the hell out of her for me…"


I reminded, "Jack if she sees me don't shoot her because it's Mira. Just keep her busy until I get away."


I slipped over the top of the dune…


Flashback – Major M – Undisclosed location


The L.Cpl. stated, "Just what sort of crazy bitch shoots hearts in the windshield."


I thought, the kind of crazy bitch that's going to kill us if she gets a chance.


The Sgt. questioned, "Are you done with those damn seats yet?"


He replied, "No Sir."


The Sgt. ordered, "Get your ass to the back of the Humvee and let me finish this job. By the way you just earned the job of being the first one out of the Humvee."


We were going to set the Humvee on fire and hoped the smoke it generated would shield us from the Sedankina bitches as we escaped, of course I still hadn't figured out the whole rest of the escape part…


Flashback – Jack – Undisclosed location


Banzai was a sneaky bastard, but I wasn't sure he was sneaky enough to get close enough to Mira to poke her in the ass with his frankenprod. I was impressed as he headed down the slope because he really looked like a bush that the wind was blowing…


Flashback – Ira – Undisclosed location


I observed movement on the dune behind my sister, concentrated my rifle scope upon it and perceived it was just another one of those blasted bushes that littered this desert. So I went back to firing at the disabled vehicle. However this game was growing old and I hoped Baskerville would arrive soon so we could terminate everyone…


Flashback – Ben – Undisclosed location


Yeah I wasn't too sure about this plan: if it went to hell I could die. My ace in the hole would be I would throw off my ghillie suit and look Mira square in the eyes. If she wanted to shoot me then, well I probably deserved it.


The hairs on the back of my neck stood up for a couple seconds, my guess is Ira saw me. But she didn't shoot so my disguise must be working. I'm at the bottom of the dune, now all I have to do is crawl close enough and not get caught…


Flashback – Jack – Undisclosed location


Damn Banzai was good - I had trained him well. That reminded me, I had better check behind me to make sure some bastard wasn't doing the same thing to me. The coast was clear and I was glad we'd taken the time to cover the Frankenmonster because I was sure the Major had some resources watching him.


He was almost to Mira so I took careful aim, and even put my finger on the trigger just in case…


Flashback – Mira – Undisclosed location


What in hades! There's a noise behind me and…


Flashback – Ira – Undisclosed location


My sister Mira jumped up, what in hades was happening? I acquired her location with my scope but I could not believe what I occulated!!! Mira was right – Fecal Matter!